One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Church boner. Awkwardddd
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
