Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
