Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
