we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
