why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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