TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
