Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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