Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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