if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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