He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
