Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
