so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
