I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
She's just so happy...and so naked.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
