he thought i was a dude.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
