Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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