Three words: puerto rican gang bang
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
