Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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