I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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