Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Randomize
