Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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