No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
