are you still at the devil's house?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
nutella sex= disaster
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
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