Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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