do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
