Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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