once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
