Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
soo... how was my night?
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