we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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