I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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