Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
