between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Randomize
