her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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