I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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