I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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