Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
