I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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