sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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