OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
