How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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