You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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