Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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