In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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