No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
