Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
