Fuck appropriateness.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
