I like to think it a success when the cops are called
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
i need an iv and a liver transplant
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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