Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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