You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
