it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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