Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
